As I’ve said in other posts, something is only as good as what you make it. Life is a braided rope of experiences, but for almost every strand of string, you’ve had the choice to decide what place it holds in the rope. In school, there are many different approaches you can take. You take one of a growth mindset, you can take one that school is a job that just needs to get done, disconnected from your “life”, or you can approach school as if it were an opportunity. One of those choices you just have to make.
The truth that I have learned in this past year is that nothing is set in stone, nothing is planned for you, and nothing is definite. I have just as much control over tomorrow as I have over the Monday ten years from now. With that as my perception of life, things can seem pretty scary. The human psyche likes to feel as if it is in control and as if it is in charge of your future. It is comfortable to feel in control, however, the truly terrifying truth is that comfortability is what will leave you powerless in the end.
I have always tried live with this fact in the forefront of my mind, but in times of uncertainty and radiated fear, the part of my brain that likes to feel comfortable, can be real stubborn. It can make me feel as though I should commit my life to one thing or that something bad will happen in the future if I don’t just stick to a plan. All of these worries, these false pressures, are what can, and has led countless people down life without meaning. A life that depends on your perception to determine your future.
At the beginning of his novel, Stephen Covey talked about the misguidance that societal norms have given humanity. He describes people as being led down the wrong path or “having the wrong map”. Your perception of success, or what others tell you as being successful, can lead you down a path of regret and emptiness. This thought stuck with me and what had lit the spark of interest that burned through the rest of this project. It was incredible to think that there was a misunderstood value of success that not only was false but also took a lot of hard work to get there. This Idea made me think about all the mistakes I had made or the F.A.I.Ls I had gone through. As Stephen had mentioned in his book, there are repetitive common themes in success, an I began to realize common themes and patterns that continued to guide me down a counter-effective path.
The three levels of living that the author explained were dependency, Independency, and interdependency. He said that to reach effectiveness, you had to be interdependent. This was a large shift in my view of the world (AKA… my paradigm). I had always tried to be independent and to go through life trying to be the best at something or inventing a product that would make me famous. The problem with that perception is that the idea of independence is what fuels capitalism, inequity, repetition, and pretty much an just an empty life 😞. I know those are pretty big topics to connect to, but it is true, the human instinct is to strive to be the best and to compete. In life, this drive for success is what makes innovation, it’s what drives change, but much like a sports team, you can’t tackle an interpersonal problem, unless you have a team to tackle it with you. In habits 4,5,6, this goal of interdependence is achieved, but before I got there, I needed to become victorious on the inside first.
The private victory consisted of habits 1 – be proactive, 2 – begin with the end in mind, and 3 – first things first. To reach maximum effectiveness, you have to tackle life from the inside out. That was the main point of this book and was also the meaning of the private victory. For each of the stages to effectiveness, we were asked to show our understanding of the goals and how they impact our lives. For this first stage, I chose to represent my understanding through a visual collage. The images at the bottom represented my life experiences and as they go up, they begin to morph into my eyes which represent my paradigm. From my paradigm, the gaze of knowledge and thinking passes through my mission statement. The personal mission statement was probably the most valued result of the project. Like the constitution, this set of guidance points are the foundation of the future and what reflects on your values and goals in life. This is meant to be that map I mentioned earlier. To create this list, I had to deeply think about my identity, as well as what I wanted out of life. Although this exercise was part of beginning with the end in mind, it encompassed all three habits in both stages of the private and public victory. This activity is what builds the foundation of success. It is not set in stone, but it represents the true essence of yourself. For me, it took a lot of critical thinking to create the points of my statement. It took concentration, reflection, and a connection to what I wanted out of life. This document represents me, and it encompasses every aspect of my life that I care deeply about and that I want to improve.
I chose all them because of the guidance they could share, although, each person has their own unique contribution to the table.
Kobe holds imense wisdom and well supported values of hard work and preserverence. He knew the importance of action towards your goals and striving to be the best. I would ask him how to be mentally strong in times of fear or worry, how to hold empathy while still striving to be the best, and how to know the balance of hard work and efficient work.
I chose Albert not for his tutoring skills but for guidance on understanding how the world works and how I can influence the world, no matter what it be.
Maya Angelou is a civil rights poet. Her wisdom on humanity and emotional connection to life are all things I would love to learn about as well as her thought process behind her art.
Stephen hawking is another influential scientists who was one of those people that will be remembered for his wisdom and knowledge. I would also like to talk to him about big life questions and ask for guidance for what science is important in our modern day.
David Suzuki is one of the most well know environmentalists, know for his wisdom and influential perspective. I would ask for guidance on where I could direct my time towards this issue as well as the balance of time.
Chief Dan George is an environmentalist and human rights advocate for the first nation’s people. I would ask how I could help people understand the importance of the connection between nature and human kind as well as ask him life questions to hear his perspective.
Mahatma Grandi. I would love to just talk with this guy. About everything from balance in life to what hold true importance in actions. I would ask him where the balance between thinking and doing is as well as the importance of emotions and feelings such as worry or fear.
I would ask all of these people to tell me their story, so I could know how to best write my own.
I mentioned earlier that it can be scary to accept that we really have little control over our life. However, putting in that time to truly dig for what you want out of life, takes away the ability of your environment or other people to determine what you do. In a way, making the effort to go within, can actually give you the control to determine what you get out in life. This was the idea behind the private victory and it was what places the sturdy roots for you to grow, and to do so with trust. This is what really made an impact on my life. It wasn’t just learning these habits, but it was using the wisdom given to critically think about who I am, and what map would best suit my life.
Coming back to the visual digital composition, you will see the purple ray of knowledge and action continue upwards in a path full of ups and downs, to reach another photo of myself, but this time brighter with my goal at my side. This represents the transformation of myself with the personal mission statement, to an effective self. This version of me is successful, not in the traditionally perceived way of wealth, but in the sense of meaning, fulfilment and balance. With this success is an accomplishment of goals that are true to me and true to my values. Although this piece may seem exaggerated or too busy, if you take a minute to really look at the movement of lines and colours, you will see how much this novel truly altered my view on life and life to come.
Earlier on in the project when these first three habits were fresh on our minds, we were asked to show our initial understanding. For this phase of the process, I created a short infomercial, pitching the habits as pills. Although conveyed as sarcastic and jokingly, I describe each of the habits and how they relate to pills in a truly in-depth way, leaving the viewer with a deep understanding of each of these habits. This one piece of work was where that spark of interest ignited the flame of understanding. As if I was in a room full of pure oxygen, my creativity and drive for a deep meaning was burning as bright as the sun, and even though I had worked on this one assignment past sundown, that flame still burned brightly, giving me a new understanding of what it meant to be privately victorious.
Once I had reached independency, I had to become Interdependent. Like I said earlier, society has been structured around independence. It is commonly perceived that dependency is what will allow you to reach success, but the truth is, 2 is better than 1. This idea of Interdependency relates to teams on all levels. From corporate employees to your school project, mastery of interdependence is the true key to successful outcomes. In Habits 3,4, and 5, we learned the skills needed to become interdependent in our lives.
After 4 days of self-growth, our reading for this project had fallen quite behind. Since we had another project in this class as well as in others, the decision was made to move on. This didn’t mean ditching the project, this just meant our readings for the novel would be moved to the side. Using summaries, videos, and activities, we were able to understand the concepts of these three habits which gave the groundwork for the work that followed. In the public victory, I chose to show what this phase meant to me by growing a flower. It was hard to do something as simple as this, but after thinking about what I learned, I knew that there wasn’t a better way to show my understanding.
As humans, there is a lot to learn from the natural world, not just about the many creatures, but about us. If you look at a flower, you probably will see a beautiful composition of colourful petals, all facing towards the glowing sun. The path to effectiveness is so closely connected to the growth of this flower that it almost seems to be made by the same principles. In my description, I explained how growing a flower represents the steady growth of understanding and the vibrant beauty of being understood. The growth also represents thinking win-win by caring for and tending to something that will give you and the ecosystem satisfaction. The flower represents synergy in the fact that all the elements of the rain, sun and soil all combine to make a beautiful thing. Although this process of transformation closely relates to the public victory, the growth from seed including germination – private victory, to a beautiful flower – public victory, represents the unseen growth and how that is eventually seen as a beautiful and effective thing.
The final habit was to sharpen the saw. Like the other names of the habits, they can feel like the represent something pretty mediocre, but the truth behind this last ask, is a true leap towards effectiveness. It feels that to achieve my goals, it’s going to take loads of late nights, painful workouts, and no wasted time. Although it is going to take plenty of hours of hard work, what this and all the other habits have taught me, is the importance of where that internal flame and drive is coming from. It will take many mistakes to find the right path, but with the right compass, I will always know which way I need to go. This is where habit seven is truly important to me. Like food in our stomachs, there is no effectiveness without fuel. Sharpening the saw for me is all about taking the time to really dig deep into what my passions are and bring those actions to fruition. Whether it be emotional wellness, mental wellness, physical wellness, or spiritual wellness, the time that I put into making myself truly happy and ready for the anything, the more I can achieve and truly push myself to get the most out of every moment. This concept is a key factor in this set of habits and is what will determine how much I achieve in life. For my representation of understanding, I chose to create a mix of sounds. These sounds were of me going through my day, sharpening my saw by doing what I love. Each activity fills a different part of my body health, giving me the fuel I need to do things like write this blog post.
This balance that is needed to achieve my goals has been a lifelong search. It has been something that I have sought out from every moment. In experiences such as loon lake or Destination Imagination, I can get closer to this balance, using the skill I have learned in the seven Habits. I mentioned in my Destination Imagination post the relation of my success to the seven habits and I can credit my success in our field study to these skills as well. Although these are only from a school assignment, their grasp on my life has been deeply ingrained into my paradigm and Identity. These are traits that won’t change, and these are traits that will guide me through future experiences, always working towards my values and passions.
Currently, my biggest setback from true effectiveness is how I compare to others. Like the first 3 habits, I have to trust in my process and my work ethic. I have to trust that my abilities and pursuit of self-mastery will hold much more meaning than action compared to others. My uniqueness is what makes me independent and my uniqueness is what will make me interdependent as well. This change is one of a paradigm shift, but with these seven habits in mind, I know that only I am more powerful than me. Thank you for reading this post and make sure to comment with any thoughts or questions you have on the project or even the book.